I feel like crap…again. I have strep, the looming possibility of cancer in both my ovaries and lymphoma. Such a win. The worst part of everything is my dad is out of work and unable to get me into the doctor until he gets his next pay check in a few months when he completes his background check interview. I’m scared and everyday feels like another day and chance to save my life slipping away. I want to be healthy, that’s all. I want to do reckless youthful things and enjoy what’s left of my youth but, I can’t, not until this is resolved.

So this past week I found out I might have cancer. Wow seeing it written is a lot more perspective changing than just saying it. I have been battling extreme fatigue and horrible spells of sadness. I am doing the best I can to joke about it and be optimistic, but frankly at the end of the day when I am sitting in bed it consumes my thoughts. Nothing really gives me the joy it use to, I feel ugly and insufficient, not even a human. I am doing the best I can, but it is hard. So all I ask is that everyone just keeps treating me normally because sometimes, even just for a moment, it helps me forget.

Rainey Day Fab

Weekly wears, Vintage dress. Red Skinnies 

I learned how to do a beehive hair-do!

My life.

Darker days

Such a treat. They did a wonderful job incorporating their new stuff with more familiars. Everyone seemed to be having a wonderful time, not only in the audience but also on stage. Loved the live syndication quality. Worth staying up as late as I did.

I officially hate him. He’s such an asshole and I am embarrassed that I actually ever cared for him. I was so fooled, I know he will live in his mom’s house for the rest of his life in Lafayette, IN talking about how great he is going to be. He was super nice when we were together but now he and his skank girlfriend who he got two weeks after we broke up (rebound) can enjoy their lives. I am out dating and enjoying myself. I even found someone I am particularly interested in ;) Side Note: I adore my friends for all of their support and lube! xooxox

I am a stress monster. I have 2 jobs now which I am super excited for, one at a hookah place (finally) and one at my favorite campus burrito joint, Currito! I am so very excited about these :) I have a test tomorrow, a 7 page paper due Monday, a test Thursday, a 2000 word essay with a group due early April, a 25 minute presentation due in 2 weeks with another group, and a test next Wednesday in math. I need to calm down and focus. My grades are very important to me and now is the time I need to buckle down and dish it out. I am amazing and I can do great things if I so choose. Love you all!